[00:17] Tara Bansal: Welcome to Her Life, Her Practice, Her Way a podcast for and about female Financial advisors.

[00:26] Tara I’m Tara Conti Bansal and I’ve been a financial planner and life coach for over 20 years.

[00:32] I want this show to share other women financial advisors journeys, struggles and triumphs.

[00:39] I want to highlight the unique and similar ways to enjoying our life and our practice on our own terms.

[00:46] I hope to build a community of like minded, deeply caring and exceptional female advisors who want to help our clients and ourselves live a life that we love.

[00:59] One that is filled with love,

[01:01] learning, connection, meaning and joy.

[01:05] Tara Bansal: Hello and welcome. This is Tara Conti Bansal on Her Life, Her Practice, Her Way and today I am super excited to have a good friend and colleague, Melissa Yano.

[01:20] She is with Capital Wealth Planners.

[01:24] I met her through Steph Bogan’s Limitless program and she impressed me back then and she was part of a different mastermind and came and joined ours which was wonderful because she was the only female in her first mastermind and I think she got stuff out of that.

[01:50] But I think she was also excited to join one that was all women. And we’ve now been together for several years and it’s been interesting and fun to see how each of us has changed and grown.

[02:05] And I just am thrilled to have you here, Melissa, and thank you for making the time.

[02:10] Melissa Yano: Yeah, thank you for the invitation. I appreciate it. I’m flattered.

[02:14] Tara Bansal: Yeah, I always start with please tell us your story. So where did you come from and how did you get where you are now?

[02:24] Melissa Yano: It is not. Yes. I would not have predicted that I would be owning a financial planning business when I was a kid certainly.

[02:32] So I grew up in Indiana, so I currently am in California, around the Sacramento area. But I grew up in the Midwest. My entire family still lives there.

[02:42] I’m the only one that left the area.

[02:46] I grew up in a pretty modest upbringing,

[02:50] a very blue collar.

[02:53] My dad worked. My mom stayed home until I was I think 12 and then she went to school to be a nurse. My dad always worked in like heavy machinery operation like in gravel pits or a steel mill is where he retired from last year.

[03:08] But so I grew up in gravel pits and there were oftentimes we did not he was laid off for the winter and so it was very modest.

[03:17] My mom was very resourceful. She always she made clothes. She made a lot of our clothes and quilts and curtains and canned and grew a lot of food and made everything homemade and worked, you know, side jobs and was a secretary at the church so she was very resourceful and kind of filled in the gaps.

[03:35] So it’s not like we didn’t have food to eat, but we. There was no extra. We never talked about money or anything like that. So I was very,

[03:42] throughout school,

[03:44] an overachiever. And I was like, I’m gonna be. Do something that’s amazing and makes a ton of money. My dad was very much like, you should be a doctor. What you should do is be a doctor.

[03:53] They make a ton of money. It’s a very cool, exciting career.

[03:57] And so that really was the path I was on. I got out of high school, I started college for biology intending to go pre med.

[04:05] And then I was super burnt out.

[04:08] I was super burnt out because I had done so many things in high school and was working a lot to just support myself and try to pay my way through college.

[04:20] And I was just so burnout.

[04:22] So I kind of went the opposite direction and stopped going to class.

[04:26] This is me being very honest.

[04:29] I stopped going to class and I was like, oh, the world does not end. How interesting.

[04:35] So it took me a little time to get through school,

[04:39] and it was kind of stops and starts. I was waitressing at the time.

[04:44] I felt more and more like biology was not the route that I wanted to go,

[04:48] especially when I hit organic chemistry. And I was like, oh, there’s probably another eight to 12 years after this that I will be trying to get myself through school while also supporting myself.

[05:00] And so I was trying to figure out what the next steps really were.

[05:05] Around that time, I got, surprise. Pregnant with my son.

[05:10] And so that changed my life a little bit.

[05:14] My partner at the time got moved out of Indiana to.

[05:20] For work for his job. And so I moved to Minnesota and then St. Louis while I was pregnant and finished school in St. Louis as a single mom with a baby and then a toddler.

[05:33] Wow. So, yeah. So I have not had. What was your degree in?

[05:38] Well, so my degree is in financial planning. Okay. So my degree is in finance with an emphasis in financial planning. I changed it. I changed my major when I went got to St.

[05:49] Louis. So I went to the University of Missouri, St. Louis.

[05:51] They had a CFP accredited program for financial planning.

[05:55] I took financial planning because I felt like I needed it for myself. I was adulting, I had a kid. I’m like, what am I supposed to be doing here?

[06:04] Just paying bills. I’m paying my bills.

[06:06] I didn’t know any of the other stuff. And so they had a financial planning course. I took that for myself. My own knowledge and Then I was like, oh, this is very interesting.

[06:15] I need this. So I. Then I took,

[06:18] you know, retirement planning and investment planning, insurance and estate planning. I took all of the CFP courses,

[06:23] got my degree in that,

[06:25] worked an internship my senior year at a financial planning firm in St. Louis, a big one.

[06:31] And that’s how I kicked off my career. So technically my degree is in finance, is in financial planning. That was my first professional career, which is also not as normal in this industry.

[06:42] Oftentimes it’s a second career.

[06:44] Yeah. And that’s how I got my start.

[06:48] Tara Bansal: And was money stressful and a source of stress growing up, would you say?

[06:55] Melissa Yano: Yeah, we didn’t have any.

[06:56] Tara Bansal: Yeah. Do you have any siblings?

[07:00] Melissa Yano: Yeah, I’m the oldest of four.

[07:01] Tara Bansal: Okay.

[07:02] Melissa Yano: So I’ve got two brothers and a sister. Wow, that’s a lot.

[07:06] Tara Bansal: And.

[07:09] Tara Bansal: Are you. I hope you enjoy what you’re doing.

[07:13] Melissa Yano: Yeah, I mean, I think it’s one of these industries where for somebody that’s a lifetime learner like myself,

[07:19] and I find some of the most random things very interesting.

[07:24] There’s always something new to learn. There’s always a different area that you can learn about or,

[07:33] you know, kind of niche down into.

[07:35] So I think it’s a very flexible career in that aspect where there’s infinite learning that could happen and you can really make it what you want it to be based on what you find interesting.

[07:48] When.

[07:49] Tara Bansal: When did you go out on your own? How long in the industry before you decided to do that?

[07:58] Melissa Yano: Well, so I didn’t really. Really, I was. I was kind of pushed into it.

[08:05] Tara Bansal: What does that mean?

[08:06] Melissa Yano: So I worked at two firms in St. Louis before I came out to California. When I came out here,

[08:14] I had previously worked at a very, like a family office, a very worth, multigenerational wealth firm.

[08:21] And I came out here and in like the Sacramento region, there’s really not a lot of big private trust companies handling, you know, huge amounts of wealth like that. And so I ended up finding a job at a small firm that worked with small business owners and kind of all a comprehensive capacity,

[08:41] 401ks, exit planning,

[08:44] group benefits, all insurances,

[08:46] wealth planning for the owners.

[08:48] And so it was a different,

[08:51] very different path than I’d been on, but I was already a cfp, so I came on as an advisor to essentially all of the clients.

[08:57] So there was a principal and myself that worked on all of the clients.

[09:00] And then I started to gain my own clients,

[09:02] and I wasn’t sure I wanted to own a business or be on my own. I had a lot of. I had a very young child that I was supporting. I had a lot of student loan debt.

[09:15] And so I was, it was not a situation where I’m like, I’m going to jump ship, not have any health insurance.

[09:21] Hopefully I can pay my bills for the next few years and I’ll just take whatever I can get. I was, I did not have a situation like that. So was an advisor in the firm really until 2020 and Covid hit and we had talked about should, you know, was I the succession plan,

[09:39] would I buy the firm from the principal?

[09:44] And I really was not sure. And in Covid it was pretty clear that he and his wife were looking to be done. And so I did, I asked, I said, hey, what would it,

[09:56] what would it look like for me to just fully take the firm over and buy.

[10:01] Tara Bansal: You out when you came on? Do you think that was what he was thinking or. Nobody thought that far ahead.

[10:10] Melissa Yano: Well,

[10:11] so I came out here in 2011.

[10:17] He may have, we have discussions about it. When I had only been at the firm a few years,

[10:24] it didn’t feel like they had a very clear idea of their timeline and what they were looking for.

[10:33] And at the time I didn’t feel like I had the capacity as a one woman show to take on all of the group benefits side and all the 401ks and all of the clients that we had.

[10:47] And so I was uncertain how it would work because it was the principal and me on kind of the wealth planning 401k side. We had a support person that supported the insurance and group benefits and did like the receptionist piece of that.

[11:04] And then the principal’s wife did,

[11:08] she was like the advisor for the group benefits and the broker for that.

[11:11] So it really felt like too much to take on for one person.

[11:17] Tara Bansal: And then you did end up buying the practice. How did that go and how has it been since then?

[11:25] Melissa Yano: So I did take the practice over at the end of 2020.

[11:29] The group benefits piece was sold separately to another broker. So I did not take that and I’m grateful that I did not. I don’t have,

[11:37] I don’t actually do any insurance at this point.

[11:41] It’s just not my favorite and I know amazing people that only work in that space. And so I refer that work out and I’m happy to do so. But I had myself, I had one support person and I was like, okay, we’re going to figure this out, let’s figure this out.

[12:04] So it was not. There are a lot of things that you don’t realize if you don’t own a business, that have to be done when you have a transition or that just have to be done on an ongoing basis when you have employees and when you are an independent RAA like I am,

[12:19] all of the compliance, all of those things. You do all of the things.

[12:22] It’s kind of a second job. So I will say my left eye twitched for like six months.

[12:30] Great. It was stressful, but I think more so now I found a rhythm.

[12:35] It’s just, you know, you learn as you go, you pivot as you go.

[12:38] And so I definitely think it was the right decision for me.

[12:41] I’m glad I did.

[12:43] Thankfully, I also have a spouse who is very supportive in that way, like emotionally, to say, you’re all right, you’re doing the right thing.

[12:54] Maybe you should go to bed early tonight, tomorrow’s a fresh day,

[12:57] you know, all of those things. And so I am lucky to have that too.

[13:01] Yeah, that’s great.

[13:03] Tara Bansal: What, what has surprised you in either a good or bad way, being in this business?

[13:16] Melissa Yano: Well, we. It’s still a male dominated business and we’re really trying to change that and trying to encourage more women to get in the business, stay in the business,

[13:31] take leadership roles and things like that.

[13:39] Negatively. I think I’m naturally a doer and a people pleaser.

[13:45] And so I feel like there were a lot of rules, some that I probably imposed on myself,

[13:51] some that were told to me about how I should be, how I should act.

[13:56] I felt very much like I was proving myself. So,

[13:59] you know, dress in neutrals, dress conservatively. Don’t be too sexy, don’t be too cute, don’t be too serious, don’t be too stern, don’t be too bossy, don’t be too know it all, but still know the answers.

[14:12] You know, all of those things. I felt like there was a lot of pressure to always have the right answer,

[14:18] to do things, to fix things for people.

[14:21] Tara Bansal: Where, where do you feel like those messages came from?

[14:25] Melissa Yano: Some of them were from colleagues, some of them were from bosses.

[14:28] Don’t wear that, don’t wear that, don’t do that. You should wear glasses. It makes you look older.

[14:33] You should not color your hair. Makes you look older.

[14:37] You need a bunch of certifications so that you can prove that you know what you’re talking about.

[14:41] So when I first came into the business, I felt very much like that, like I was proving something.

[14:47] I, um.

[14:49] Or that I had to fit in as much as I could with the men.

[14:54] Tara Bansal: Well, and that’s Part of my reason for doing this podcast, hence the name, is I.

[14:59] I don’t want that,

[15:01] and I don’t want other women to feel like they have to do that.

[15:06] Melissa Yano: So.

[15:06] Tara Bansal: Yeah.

[15:07] Melissa Yano: Yeah, we’re trying to get away from that.

[15:09] Tara Bansal: Yeah.

[15:10] Melissa Yano: And.

[15:12] Tara Bansal: What has helped you not feel that way or be able to do things your own way?

[15:23] Melissa Yano: Age?

[15:24] I’m. Yeah, some of it is. I mean, some of it is. I think you get to a certain. At least for me, I’ve gotten to a certain age where I’m trying to unlearn all of that and really lean into exactly who I want to be.

[15:40] And some of that,

[15:41] I actually.

[15:43] So I’m just more comfortable with who I am and my own personality and all of those quirks that I have.

[15:51] But, you know, last year, even I worked with someone,

[15:55] a stylist,

[15:56] to get more comfortable with the way that I want to dress. Like, I don’t only have to wear black suits,

[16:04] so I’ve tried to soften there with wearing more bright colors and wearing more.

[16:10] Not super float, not, like,

[16:12] super relaxed dresses, but things that are comfortable,

[16:17] comfortable and feel more feminine and being okay with,

[16:22] you know, not worrying as much as if I’m overdressed or I look,

[16:27] you know, too feminine or something like that. So I’ve let go of a lot of the black pantsuits,

[16:33] and now I’m wearing burgundy suits or,

[16:36] you know, long skirts with boots or whatever. I feel like.

[16:40] Tara Bansal: Yeah, that’s wonderful. And what is the structure of your firm now?

[16:46] Melissa Yano: So I am an independent Ria,

[16:49] and right now I just have one support person who change.

[16:54] Yeah. So she is an admin for me, and she’s excellent.

[16:59] So I have a virtual assistant named Beth, and she does a lot of work to save me for myself.

[17:06] So she does all of my email sorting. She does all of my scheduling for clients or for, you know, COI meetings or for any scheduling I have for travel and trips for work,

[17:19] sometimes for personal stuff like that. So it’s really been a game changer for me to have somebody supporting me for that.

[17:27] When did you project stuff?

[17:29] She. I have been working with her for,

[17:32] I think, two and a half years. Okay.

[17:34] Yeah.

[17:37] Tara Bansal: I interrupted you.

[17:38] Tara Bansal: I’m sorry. Keep going.

[17:39] Melissa Yano: What.

[17:42] Tara Bansal: What. What else do you outsource?

[17:46] Melissa Yano: I have an outside compliance firm that helps with my compliance.

[17:51] You know, I do some of this stuff my adv, but they support me kind of throughout the year. I outsource my it.

[17:58] Okay.

[17:59] I outsource a lot of the things that we used to do in house. Like, I Said the insurance piece of it.

[18:07] When I have employees that are W2 employees, I outsource the HR piece of that.

[18:15] Yes. I probably still do too many things myself.

[18:20] Yeah,

[18:21] do.

[18:24] Tara Bansal: So you do the planning, you do the investments, you do all of that.

[18:29] Melissa Yano: Yeah, but I do use a tamp.

[18:31] So I work with Assetmark as a tamp. So I build the portfolios from their investment strategies, but I don’t do the day to day trading in portfolios and I don’t build out like their strategies and rebalancing.

[18:46] I don’t do any of that. I don’t do reporting, I don’t do the billing.

[18:51] So I’ve outsourced that piece to them where I’m taking kind of a broader overview of it and I’ve got that extra layer of due diligence and portfolio managers and you know, I can talk to them about that.

[19:04] Tara Bansal: Who, who is your ideal client that you want to work with?

[19:09] Melissa Yano: So I work with small business owners mainly that have been in the business for a handful of years,

[19:17] are usually mid career, so 40s, 50s, maybe early 60s,

[19:21] and have some time until they exit their business.

[19:24] I work with a fair amount of business owners that are women that are the primary breadwinner in their family,

[19:31] which is my own situation as well.

[19:36] Yeah.

[19:37] That just want help and they want kind of a teammate or a partner to look at how their business supports their, their personal life and their personal finances and then to make a plan to at some point exit the business or retire, whatever that looks like.

[19:52] Okay.

[19:54] Tara Bansal: Do you help with 401ks and 403bs?

[19:59] Melissa Yano: Yeah, so I do all retirement plans,

[20:01] 401ks, 457s, 403 non qualified deferred comp. ESOP, all of those things.

[20:08] If I’m also working with the business owner and we’re being strategic about how that plan supports their business and supports them as a business owner and supports their own goals too.

[20:21] Great.

[20:22] Tara Bansal: Yeah, I think that’s important. How has being a business owner helped influence you with this role?

[20:34] Melissa Yano: Well, my, my coach tells me that I clearly seek out areas that I need. I feel like I need to master.

[20:44] Tara Bansal: Like you did way back when. Even just with getting enrolled in the financial planning, like you saw this need.

[20:49] Melissa Yano: For yourself and I learned it and then I felt like,

[20:54] I mean we always kind of worked with small business owners, but we had a lot of retirees and things like that. I’ve kind of honed in and I think it’s because I wanted to more expertise for myself as a business owner.

[21:06] I Empathize with it because I am a business owner and so many especially smaller business owners where it’s, you know, a one person owner or a couple of partners or a husband, wife that own the business,

[21:17] they just, they don’t know how to be strategic. They’re just concerned about doing the day to day, keeping the doors open. Do we have money in a bank account? Do we have clients or customers?

[21:28] And it can be much more intentional than that.

[21:32] And you can build a really nice even contingency plan to lower risk or, you know, look at the whole picture. How does estate planning fit in with the business? All of those things.

[21:42] And so, yeah, I think a lot of it is, you know, you seek out where you are in life and attract the kind of clients that are similar to you.

[21:52] Yeah, so that’s going to thread.

[21:54] Yeah, yeah.

[21:56] Tara Bansal: Do you, do you feel like you do business consulting in addition to the financial planning?

[22:05] Melissa Yano: So I am a certified exit planner and I have worked in engagements where we really focus on the process of exiting the business,

[22:20] identifying the successors, whether it’s internal or external, or maybe it’s a sale to, you know, private equity firm or an outside party and kind of working through that whole process with the CPAs and business brokers and all of those things and then coming through on the other side.

[22:35] And what does your situation look like now? And you know, what should we be doing there for your personal financial planning now?

[22:42] So I have done that piece, the exit planning piece, quite a bit.

[22:45] Um,

[22:47] some business consulting business planning just naturally, I think happens with what I do with the planning.

[22:55] So I can see if your business is running,

[22:59] you have no cash in your business and you very heavily rely on a line of credit.

[23:06] I mean, I can see that that is a problem and you’re probably not working in your business from a place of intentionality. But just like we’ve got to keep this thing going, we need cash coming in the door and that’s a hard place to make decisions from.

[23:21] And it’s hard to be flexible when you have a client that you lose or an employee that you lose or just a situation that comes up. Maybe you get,

[23:30] you, you get sick or you’re disabled and you don’t have a lot of margin there. So yes, taxes. I look at all the tax returns for the business as impersonal.

[23:40] So I often point out things there.

[23:43] Tara Bansal: What are some of your favorite parts of the job?

[23:48] Melissa Yano: I mean, I think it comes back down to why I originally got into the business is like the impact that you can really see on someone’s life.

[23:58] And I have always believed money as a learned skill.

[24:02] So there’s no. There’s a lot. So much emotion and shame around not knowing what to do with it or how to manage it or,

[24:09] you know, you should have done this when you were 20 years old, and then you’d be a multimillionaire now and really just trying to make that more accessible for people where they have somebody, they can ask questions without feeling like they’re stupid or that they can’t be honest or that I expect them to know a bunch of stuff.

[24:26] I mean, that’s really what I strive to do because I. Like I said, I came up in a family that did not talk about money, did not really know about money or investments or anything like that.

[24:37] And so I think it’s really important to get that knowledge out. I do a lot of work with 401k participants,

[24:44] again, to just talk about basic financial planning or what the tax changes mean or how a 401k works,

[24:51] all of those types of things. So bringing financial planning to people that have generally not thought that they were rich enough, smart enough, all of those things is very important to me.

[25:07] That’s beautiful.

[25:10] Tara Bansal: What are some of your core values related to that, and how did they show up in how you both work and live?

[25:21] Melissa Yano: Well, I recently just made a list last year of my core values, and I think they are different than they would have been 10 or 20 years ago. So now I’m really focused on client impact,

[25:35] on my own health,

[25:38] on the health of my own marriage and family,

[25:41] on social connections and on just like, an unhurriedness.

[25:46] And so that’s what I try to bring to, like, a whole person kind of thing to my clients and financial planning.

[25:54] It’s not just about this number in your bank account and what this performance return was and, you know, how much money you can spend.

[26:02] It’s,

[26:03] what do you and your spouse want to do?

[26:05] How do you want to take a trip with your adult kids so that you can all get together? Are, you know,

[26:13] you’re worried about your health, and so you want to make sure you can take this kickboxing class?

[26:21] All of those things. I think it’s much more about what you’re doing with the money and how it supports your life and less about the numbers on the page.

[26:30] Tara Bansal: Yeah, I 100% agree. What motivated you or helped you do that?

[26:38] Melissa Yano: Value exercise by coaching.

[26:42] So for me,

[26:43] anybody that doesn’t have some sort of mindset, coach or whatever, you know, somebody wants to call it life Coach or something like that.

[26:55] For me, someone who is very type A, very organized, very driven, very,

[27:00] you know, facts driven,

[27:02] brought up in a world of you work hard,

[27:05] sick days are not a thing. Like your work is your value.

[27:08] Undoing that is really hard. And you don’t even realize that you, you do life that way.

[27:16] And so having somebody that can ask you questions and, and really point out to you,

[27:22] you know, ask you what is important to you right now,

[27:25] what are you solving for?

[27:28] Makes you think like, oh, what am I solving for? Is it a specific number? Is it a number of clients, Is it a revenue number? Or is it just like the way that I want to feel when I go about my day?

[27:39] Yeah.

[27:40] Tara Bansal: And even to pause to think of that instead of just be for me reacting and running as hard as you can.

[27:48] Melissa Yano: Right. Yeah.

[27:49] Tara Bansal: I think way too many of us are like hearing you talk. I identify as a people pleaser and overly driven and I love,

[28:00] I forget what word you just used but like the feeling of more spaciousness or whatever in your day, I love.

[28:10] Melissa Yano: Yeah. And that is not natural, it does not come naturally to me. So it sounds silly to say I really have to work at creating margin, at not being reactive, at slowing down,

[28:25] but I do.

[28:28] Tara Bansal: And with that in mind, what have you done to help make that happen for you?

[28:37] Melissa Yano: I try to stay out of my email until somebody else has sorted it into what I actually need to respond to and I actually need to review.

[28:46] And just having the space in between when things are coming in, like I’m not notified when, when emails hit me, I look at it a few times a day, just having the space between something hitting and me thinking, oh my gosh, I have to find this, I have to stop what I’m doing,

[29:02] I have to fix this instead. I can look at it,

[29:05] you know, after I’ve already done some work in the morning and say, okay, let me take half an hour and answer these things. And it’s much less reactive for me.

[29:15] I also have someone schedule that me that won’t schedule me for eight meetings in a day and will not try to squish a meeting in on the 1:30 minute opening I have in the day, which I will do to myself all the time.

[29:31] And I say no. I say no a fair amount and I feel guilty doing it.

[29:37] But I also operate much better when I have some space.

[29:43] Tara Bansal: And it sounds like your virtual assistant in some situations saves you from yourself.

[29:51] Melissa Yano: Yes.

[29:51] Tara Bansal: Yeah,

[29:52] that’s good.

[29:53] When did you make the change?

[29:56] Maybe it was when you got the virtual assistant around email.

[30:00] I feel like that’s something I want to do, but I’m, like, too scared to do.

[30:05] Melissa Yano: I.

[30:08] Dan Martell’s book, Buy Back your Time is what spurred me to do it through a person in our mastermind, Kristen, who had been. I think it was Kristen who had been on a Carl Richards session where I think he interviewed Dan Martell and they talked about buying back your time.

[30:26] And. And Carl Richards has the email sorted.

[30:29] And I was like, that sounds amazing, because I hate digging through emails. I hate the way it makes me feel reactive.

[30:37] And so that’s where I started. It’s taken time. I mean, it’s certainly evolved. Toward the end of last year, I got very sloppy where I was getting in there again.

[30:44] So it takes time. But if you can start that process and have someone help you with it that is not so emotionally tied to everything and. And can answer some things for you and take that off your plate, it really does make a big difference.

[31:01] So that I’m. I reread that book at the beginning of this year, Buy Back youk Time, and I think it’s a great practical guide to how you can outsource some things.

[31:12] Tara Bansal: Yeah, I’m gonna check it out. Sounds good. What. Do you have an idea of what your ideal practice looks like?

[31:24] Melissa Yano: I. It’s a work in progress.

[31:27] It’s a work in progress, and I have to really guard again, like, I have to stay in my own lane and run your own. And run my own race is really important for me, for me right now.

[31:41] So I have actually had to bow out of books or podcasts or groups or things like that where I hear somebody wanting to 10x a business, wanting to have, you know, a $250 million business, or they want to have 500 clients or they want all of these things because then it makes me feel pressured.

[32:02] Like I should want these things. I should. If I’m doing this right, the right way, then I should want to grow and in 10x and grow a bazillion times over.

[32:10] And I think for where I’m at in my life, that’s not the right answer. So I have to really stay out of that and try to listen to myself right now.

[32:18] Because the perfect practice for me is smaller with a lot of depth for my clients.

[32:26] So I really want to know the people I work with,

[32:28] know about their lives, be very involved,

[32:32] have high touch on them every year, within the year.

[32:37] So having a very big practice with a lot of clients or a lot of employees to manage.

[32:43] Also, I find the idea of that draining to having a big kind of business to business over.

[32:53] So I think for me, it is a smaller enterprise that has not a ton of clients that I work with closely, and we really have a great relationship.

[33:04] Tara Bansal: Is there a certain number of households that you think would be ideal?

[33:10] Melissa Yano: To me, it’s, go ahead, I cut you off.

[33:14] Tara Bansal: No, my. For me, it’s like,

[33:16] I just think of, like, what is enough?

[33:18] We tell our clients that all the time. Right. And I’m sure as you’re working with business owners,

[33:24] and so that’s what comes to mind for me. Like,

[33:30] is it,

[33:32] you know, a certain number of clients,

[33:34] and then you’d be like, this is all I need. This is great.

[33:38] Melissa Yano: Yes. So I think for me, probably 75 clients would be my true ideal that were actual ideal clients for me. Yep.

[33:52] Tara Bansal: Where are you now? Either with, like, numbers or how many are not ideal?

[33:59] Melissa Yano: I think I’m not far from that. I think I have about 70 now,

[34:07] but the makeup has changed, and that’s on purpose. So like I said, I’m not taking on.

[34:13] I’m trying to be much more selective about who I say yes to, which also is something that I have to deal with. Changing my own identity as the person that can help everyone,

[34:27] it’s just not realistic. And so making sure I’m saying no,

[34:34] you know, I try to be honest, but kind to clients that I’m not the right fit for and make sure they get someplace else that is the right fit. But I’m not taking on,

[34:43] you know, 401k plans that I don’t have another relationship with with the owners. And I’ve set, you know, fee minimums. I’ve set minimums for assets under management now.

[34:57] And so some of it is just making sure that I’m getting the right clients in that are a good fit.

[35:08] Tara Bansal: Is that hard to do?

[35:11] Melissa Yano: Well, I mean, I think,

[35:13] you know, you have to have clients to run a business, and there’s a natural attrition. So if you have business owners, they sell their business.

[35:20] If you have clients, they pass away.

[35:23] And so there isn’t a.

[35:24] There’s a little bit of a changing of clients inside every year. But I have not done a lot of heavy marketing to this point.

[35:37] That’s really lined into my ideal client. Most of my referrals come from other advisors, insurance brokers,

[35:45] attorneys, bookkeepers, things like that that work with other business owners. And so I think what’s on my list this year is to see how I can really lean into those relationships so that they understand how I can help clients, but I don’t.

[36:03] Someone once told me that I was not good at business and I was not good at sales.

[36:09] So I’m still trying to overcome that story, I think.

[36:12] Yeah.

[36:12] Tara Bansal: Do you know who said that?

[36:15] Melissa Yano: Yes. Okay. I will never forget it.

[36:18] Tara Bansal: Oh, and what would you. What advice do you have for.

[36:27] Melissa Yano: I.

[36:27] Tara Bansal: Don’T know, women coming into this business or.

[36:32] Melissa Yano: Yeah, yeah. I mean, I think anybody coming into this business has to know that there are lots of ways to do it.

[36:41] And I think the best way to get started is to just get in and get some experience,

[36:46] wherever that is. And that helps you realize what you like, what you don’t like, the type of environment that you want to be in.

[36:55] I think for women especially,

[36:59] you don’t have to be a certain way, like, don’t feel like you should be on a certain track, on a certain timeline, that you don’t have to act a certain way.

[37:08] There is a spot for you. Like, there is a place for you to be exactly who you are. And there’s a lot of value in that because we, as women,

[37:15] advise differently.

[37:17] We have different conversations,

[37:20] and there is a lot of value in that. It’s a superpower.

[37:24] So if you can know that going in and stay in the business and find your own path, I think it can be really rewarding.

[37:35] Tara Bansal: I agree. How. How do you think we can get more women into the business?

[37:42] Melissa Yano: Well, I think trying to support students.

[37:46] So I am part of my FPA Financial Planning association chapter. We have a really high attendance rate or involvement from student bodies from Chico State, from Sac State, from UC Davis, which are local schools around here.

[38:01] And so we are trying to support them however we can so that they can learn how to come into the business so that they have conn with advisors that need,

[38:12] you know, younger advisors or younger support people that are coming out of school.

[38:20] So that is how I’m trying to.

[38:22] Tara Bansal: Support other women getting in. Yeah. Did you feel like you had any mentors or anyone that helped support you?

[38:35] Melissa Yano: Um, well, I. The school that I had had a really strong internship program.

[38:42] Um,

[38:44] so, like, the head of the financial planning department,

[38:47] he.

[38:49] It was like an evening.

[38:52] It wasn’t a dinner, but it was like a meet and greet kind of thing where all of the firms, big firms around St. Louis,

[38:58] and there were a lot there. There were several big financial planning firms there.

[39:02] They would come to this meet and greet and you would have students there and they would interview us,

[39:07] like a speed dating kind of thing, because they were looking for interns or perhaps, you Know students that could come out and work for their businesses. And so I did that.

[39:17] I had three offers for internships from three different firms. And so I was lucky enough to be able to choose one.

[39:26] It was an independent firm. They had 28,

[39:29] I think, at that point, advisors,

[39:31] the team that I worked with had a female advisor and a male advisor.

[39:36] And so I really got to see that a female advisor. And there weren’t a ton in the firm,

[39:42] so I got to see that. And the next firm I worked at, it was the principals were probably 50, 50 male and female. Oh, wow. So I was lucky that I got to see women in those roles.

[39:58] I mean, I still go to conferences where maybe there are four or six women at the whole thing.

[40:04] Yeah. And that’s okay. That’s part of it. But,

[40:08] yeah, I think I saw women in that. An actual financial advisory role early on.

[40:14] Tara Bansal: That can make a difference.

[40:16] Tara Bansal: Yeah.

[40:17] Tara Bansal: What does success look like or feel like for you these days?

[40:25] Melissa Yano: Well, I am trying to figure that out.

[40:28] But I do know,

[40:30] as we all are,

[40:31] it’s a continuum. I do know for me, it is at this point, having more space,

[40:40] being able to.

[40:42] And I’m once again lucky that I. I’m in a place in my business where I can be selective about the clients that I bring on that are really good fits for me.

[40:51] Just kind of being.

[40:53] Knowing that I have enough,

[40:55] and then just being able to be a little softer in general.

[40:59] So I keep reminding my. My coaches,

[41:06] he often says to me, for your consideration,

[41:09] you should know that not everyone feels compelled to live their life this way. Like, not everyone overthinks every decision.

[41:18] Not everyone feels like they need to get an A plus on everything. And so I think just sitting in this place of, yeah, having enough, I’m enough.

[41:29] My work doesn’t prove that I’m enough.

[41:32] Just being really comfortable with myself, which is not a number figure, and it’s not,

[41:37] you know, a revenue figure or something like that. It’s just being satisfied.

[41:47] Tara Bansal: I feel like we all need to hear that, or maybe I just do, because I think we’re wired pretty similarly.

[41:52] What advice would you have for your younger self?

[41:56] Melissa Yano: Oh, chill out.

[42:00] Chill out.

[42:02] You know what? I think my younger self,

[42:07] I appreciate her very much because she was so resourceful and did exactly what she needed to do.

[42:13] So.

[42:18] I am grateful that it happened that way. But at the time, I didn’t feel like I had a choice. Now part of my success now is I get to choose.

[42:27] So I think just letting her know that,

[42:30] like this, all.

[42:31] All the Struggle. All of this work will pay off and at one point you will. At some point you’ll get to chill out and do Pilates on Friday mornings.

[42:42] Tara Bansal: At 8am and that’s in your schedule.

[42:46] Melissa Yano: That is in my schedule. And I do not divert from that if I can at all help it.

[42:52] Tara Bansal: What I feel like you are a learner. How do you invest in yourself?

[42:58] Melissa Yano: I.

[42:59] Through experts.

[43:04] Like I said, I have a coach and have now four several years actually. I invested in Limitless Advisors, which, like you said, is how we met.

[43:13] Which was a great place to not only learn about the business of advising, like the actual business, but to meet so many people,

[43:21] met so many great people. Sometimes running a business is lonely.

[43:25] I invested in someone to help me dial myself and make that a little easier last year because I’m in perimenopause and your body is shifts and you’re like, what is this?

[43:35] I don’t know what to do here anymore.

[43:38] You know, I invest in courses or certifications that are once again knowledge of things that I either feel like I need to shore up on or need to like, just want to learn for myself.

[43:52] And then honestly, I indulge in facials like a few times a year.

[43:58] And that is an investment that’s great in my skin.

[44:02] Tara Bansal: Do you. How do you decide? Do you have a budget or.

[44:11] Melissa Yano: I don’t. I.

[44:13] I know the rule of thumb. I’ve seen rule of thumbs that are 5% or 10% of, you know, kind of your revenue should go to professional or personal development.

[44:24] Um,

[44:25] I don’t spend.

[44:26] I don’t spend that much. I’m a frugal person. But last year I experimented a little bit with spending more in areas that perhaps I didn’t need to justify because there was a super practical reason.

[44:41] Um, so no, I don’t budget for things like books or audiobooks or things like that. Those are pretty much if I think I’m going to read it, that’s a worthwhile investment.

[44:52] But bigger things,

[44:53] once I bit the bullet to pay for an actual coach,

[44:57] that’s a.

[44:59] That’s the best investment I’ve ever made.

[45:01] Oh,

[45:02] I love it.

[45:05] Tara Bansal: What do you have a favorite book, podcast or resource that you’re loving right now?

[45:12] Melissa Yano: Um, let’s see. So I split my books between nonfiction and fiction. Me too.

[45:18] Tara Bansal: Yeah, I try to alternate a lot.

[45:21] Melissa Yano: Yeah, I read a lot. So I just. I said buy back your time. I think that’s a great book. I just read the Frozen River.

[45:30] Tara Bansal: Uhhuh. I love.

[45:30] Melissa Yano: Which is kind of like a historic oh, what a great book.

[45:34] And then I don’t think I have kind of bowed out of podcasts that are related to, like, advising.

[45:41] So there. I love Cal Newport’s Deep Questions.

[45:46] I actually like Money for Couples with Ramit Sethi because I think that is actually helpful. Just conversations that I have with my own husband. You know, it’s about couples and their money.

[45:59] I love the visibility shift. That’s Ellie Steinbrink does that.

[46:05] She’s this stylist that I work with. If you are a woman that’s an advisor, that’s of kind. Kind of in your 40s, 50s, I think that’s a great one. Just to, you know, make you think outside the box a little bit as far as how you show up in the world.

[46:21] Yeah.

[46:22] Wonderful.

[46:24] Tara Bansal: Your go to self care ritual.

[46:27] Melissa Yano: Well, every morning I start my day with reading.

[46:31] So I either read or listen to an audiobook. And I drink coffee, which is now decaf,

[46:37] every day. So I get up pretty much the same time every day of the week. And I do this to start every single day,

[46:43] even if I have to get up a little earlier because I got to be out the door early. I make sure I have a half an hour to just read and drink coffee and just be.

[46:52] And then I do really the only thing I indulge in for myself. I feel very strongly about skin care. So please, ladies, wear your sunscreen.

[47:02] But I do like to have like a facial or a massage, and I normally try to wrap that into when I have like a business planning or a CEO retreat.

[47:12] So if I’m really getting into the weeds of my business for a day or two or doing,

[47:17] you know, heavy work with my coach for a day or two, then I will end that with a massage or a facial.

[47:23] I love it.

[47:24] Tara Bansal: A nice reward.

[47:25] Melissa Yano: I bribe myself. Yeah. To look forward to.

[47:29] Tara Bansal: What’s one thing bringing you joy right now?

[47:32] Melissa Yano: Oh,

[47:39] Something bringing me joy.

[47:44] Movement.

[47:46] Movement.

[47:48] Yeah. I feel like I do two Pilates classes and I’ve started back to hot yoga. And it’s just really kind of clears out everything in the brain,

[48:00] which sounds trite, but for me, when it’s wintertime and it’s cold and, you know, especially cold there or it’s rainy,

[48:07] you get in there and you can just like wash it out.

[48:14] Tara Bansal: Anything else you’d like to share that we didn’t cover?

[48:23] Melissa Yano: I don’t think so. I mean, I really appreciate what you’re doing here because women advisors, female advisors, women business owners really do need to support each other. I think we’re really hard on ourselves.

[48:37] I think we undervalue ourselves.

[48:40] And so,

[48:43] you know, sometimes you need somebody to say, hey, you’re undercharging or you’re over servicing or things like that. And so the more that we can hear each other’s stories and each other’s struggles and know that,

[48:53] you know,

[48:54] all paths are different, but all paths are, you know, individual. And they’re good paths, I think is is really important.

[49:01] So we should all give ourselves more grace.

[49:04] Tara Bansal: Oh, I love that. You said that so beautifully. I feel like that’s the perfect way to end. So thank you so much, Melissa.

[49:11] Melissa Yano: Yeah, my pleasure. Thank you. This is a really great podcast.

[49:16] Tara Bansal: I re listened to this episode with Melissa more than I usually do, and I kept coming back to one core theme.

[49:24] Permission.

[49:25] Melissa talked about leaning into who she actually is and how age has helped her stop trying so hard to please everyone,

[49:34] fit a mold, or prove herself,

[49:37] especially in a male dominated industry.

[49:41] That really struck a chord with me.

[49:43] As women in this profession,

[49:45] especially those of us who are driven doers and people pleasers,

[49:50] we absorb subtle messages about how we should show up.

[49:55] Be competent, but not intimidating.

[49:58] Be confident, but not too strong or arrogant.

[50:02] Grow bigger, earn more,

[50:04] do more,

[50:06] do it all.

[50:07] But Melissa’s quiet clarity felt different.

[50:10] She’s opting out of the noise and other people’s expectations.

[50:14] She’s intentionally choosing fewer clients with deeper relationships, a practice that fits her life,

[50:23] delegating what drains her spaciousness instead of constantly filling every moment.

[50:29] And that question,

[50:31] what is enough?

[50:32] Is one that I have loved for a long time and I keep coming back to.

[50:37] We ask our clients that question all the time,

[50:40] but are we asking ourselves what is enough?

[50:44] I loved her courage to step away from the messaging that says more is better,

[50:49] that 10 times growth is the goal. That scale equals impact.

[50:55] What if impact isn’t about size?

[50:58] What if it’s about presence and how you show up?

[51:01] About being a role model for our clients,

[51:05] our families, and the people around us.

[51:08] That success can include balance and softness in our own definition of joy.

[51:14] Melissa spoke about investing in herself,

[51:17] getting a coach,

[51:18] challenging, limiting beliefs,

[51:21] choosing growth personally, not just professionally.

[51:25] I loved how clear she was about her values and how honest she was that they’ve evolved over time.

[51:31] She’s designing her life on purpose.

[51:34] And if I’m honest, I’m craving more of that spaciousness too.

[51:39] At the beginning of this year, I chose my word or theme for 2026 to be pause.

[51:45] Because I want less reacting and more intentional choosing,

[51:50] less proving and more being.

[51:53] I want more cushion I want more margin,

[51:56] more breadth between the ask and my answer.

[52:00] I want to pause before I commit pause before I take something on.

[52:05] I want my default to be no.

[52:07] Unless it’s a clear, wholehearted hell yes.

[52:11] This episode reminded me, and I hope it reminds you,

[52:15] that there is no single quote right way to build a practice or a life.

[52:21] You don’t have to wear the black pants suit or the skirt suit with pantyhose like I once had to.

[52:27] You don’t have to build the giant firm.

[52:29] You don’t have to take on every client.

[52:32] You don’t have to keep doing things just because you can look for and feel the real yeses.

[52:40] You get to design your life and your practice in a way that honors your strengths,

[52:46] your energy,

[52:47] and what gives you joy.

[52:50] You have the permission to do it your way and to lean fully into who you truly are.

[52:57] Thank you for listening to her life, her practice, Her Way A Podcast for and About Female Financial Advisors.

[53:06] I truly hope you have enjoyed this podcast and got some value from it. If so, I would love to ask a favor of you.

[53:13] Please go to Apple Podcasts or Spotify and rate and review my podcast. This will help me get the word out to other amazing like minded female financial advisors.

[53:24] You can also send it to a friend or two who you think would gain something from listening to it.

[53:30] Until next time, I’m wishing you the very best.

Capital Wealth Planners – Melissa’s Firm
https://capitalwealthplanner.com/

Limitless Advisor with Stephanie Bogan
https://limitlessfa.life/

AssetMark – TAMP Solution Melissa Utilizes
https://www.assetmark.com/

Buy Back Your Time by Dan Martell
https://www.buybackyourtime.com

The Frozen River by Ariel Lawhon
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/112975658-the-frozen-river

Deep Questions Podcast – Cal Newport
https://www.calnewport.com/podcast/

Money for Couples – Ramit Sethi
https://www.iwillteachyoutoberich.com/podcast/

The Visibility Shift – Ellie Steinbrink
https://www.elliesteinbrink.com/podcast/categories/the-visibility-shift-podcast

Financial Planning Association (FPA)
https://www.financialplanningassociation.org

Melissa M. Yano, CFP® CExP™

As a business owner herself, Melissa understands the time and energy demands owners face. She brings over seventeen years of in-depth experience in financial planning. Her expertise extends beyond traditional investment management to include financial analysis, cash flow planning, and retirement income forecasting tailored specifically for business owners and their families.

Before Capital Wealth Planners, Melissa was a highly respected Client Manager for St. Louis Trust Company servicing multi-generational high-net-worth families in all aspects of wealth planning. Her depth of experience also includes Moneta Group, where she was a client support member, prepping review materials and managing stock and bond trades. Melissa graduated magna cum laude with a BSBA in Finance from the University of Missouri – St. Louis, through the CFP® board-registered program in Financial Planning and has held her CFP® designation since 2011.

Melissa lives with her family and dog outside of Sacramento. She enjoys reading, yoga and desserts of all types.

 

[00:17] Tara Bansal: Welcome to Her Life, Her Practice, Her Way a podcast for and about female Financial advisors.

[00:26] Tara I’m Tara Conti Bansal and I’ve been a financial planner and life coach for over 20 years.

[00:32] I want this show to share other women financial advisors journeys, struggles and triumphs.

[00:39] I want to highlight the unique and similar ways to enjoying our life and our practice on our own terms.

[00:46] I hope to build a community of like minded, deeply caring and exceptional female advisors who want to help our clients and ourselves live a life that we love.

[00:59] One that is filled with love,

[01:01] learning, connection, meaning and joy.

[01:05] Tara Bansal: Hello and welcome. This is Tara Conti Bansal on Her Life, Her Practice, Her Way and today I am super excited to have a good friend and colleague, Melissa Yano.

[01:20] She is with Capital Wealth Planners.

[01:24] I met her through Steph Bogan’s Limitless program and she impressed me back then and she was part of a different mastermind and came and joined ours which was wonderful because she was the only female in her first mastermind and I think she got stuff out of that.

[01:50] But I think she was also excited to join one that was all women. And we’ve now been together for several years and it’s been interesting and fun to see how each of us has changed and grown.

[02:05] And I just am thrilled to have you here, Melissa, and thank you for making the time.

[02:10] Melissa Yano: Yeah, thank you for the invitation. I appreciate it. I’m flattered.

[02:14] Tara Bansal: Yeah, I always start with please tell us your story. So where did you come from and how did you get where you are now?

[02:24] Melissa Yano: It is not. Yes. I would not have predicted that I would be owning a financial planning business when I was a kid certainly.

[02:32] So I grew up in Indiana, so I currently am in California, around the Sacramento area. But I grew up in the Midwest. My entire family still lives there.

[02:42] I’m the only one that left the area.

[02:46] I grew up in a pretty modest upbringing,

[02:50] a very blue collar.

[02:53] My dad worked. My mom stayed home until I was I think 12 and then she went to school to be a nurse. My dad always worked in like heavy machinery operation like in gravel pits or a steel mill is where he retired from last year.

[03:08] But so I grew up in gravel pits and there were oftentimes we did not he was laid off for the winter and so it was very modest.

[03:17] My mom was very resourceful. She always she made clothes. She made a lot of our clothes and quilts and curtains and canned and grew a lot of food and made everything homemade and worked, you know, side jobs and was a secretary at the church so she was very resourceful and kind of filled in the gaps.

[03:35] So it’s not like we didn’t have food to eat, but we. There was no extra. We never talked about money or anything like that. So I was very,

[03:42] throughout school,

[03:44] an overachiever. And I was like, I’m gonna be. Do something that’s amazing and makes a ton of money. My dad was very much like, you should be a doctor. What you should do is be a doctor.

[03:53] They make a ton of money. It’s a very cool, exciting career.

[03:57] And so that really was the path I was on. I got out of high school, I started college for biology intending to go pre med.

[04:05] And then I was super burnt out.

[04:08] I was super burnt out because I had done so many things in high school and was working a lot to just support myself and try to pay my way through college.

[04:20] And I was just so burnout.

[04:22] So I kind of went the opposite direction and stopped going to class.

[04:26] This is me being very honest.

[04:29] I stopped going to class and I was like, oh, the world does not end. How interesting.

[04:35] So it took me a little time to get through school,

[04:39] and it was kind of stops and starts. I was waitressing at the time.

[04:44] I felt more and more like biology was not the route that I wanted to go,

[04:48] especially when I hit organic chemistry. And I was like, oh, there’s probably another eight to 12 years after this that I will be trying to get myself through school while also supporting myself.

[05:00] And so I was trying to figure out what the next steps really were.

[05:05] Around that time, I got, surprise. Pregnant with my son.

[05:10] And so that changed my life a little bit.

[05:14] My partner at the time got moved out of Indiana to.

[05:20] For work for his job. And so I moved to Minnesota and then St. Louis while I was pregnant and finished school in St. Louis as a single mom with a baby and then a toddler.

[05:33] Wow. So, yeah. So I have not had. What was your degree in?

[05:38] Well, so my degree is in financial planning. Okay. So my degree is in finance with an emphasis in financial planning. I changed it. I changed my major when I went got to St.

[05:49] Louis. So I went to the University of Missouri, St. Louis.

[05:51] They had a CFP accredited program for financial planning.

[05:55] I took financial planning because I felt like I needed it for myself. I was adulting, I had a kid. I’m like, what am I supposed to be doing here?

[06:04] Just paying bills. I’m paying my bills.

[06:06] I didn’t know any of the other stuff. And so they had a financial planning course. I took that for myself. My own knowledge and Then I was like, oh, this is very interesting.

[06:15] I need this. So I. Then I took,

[06:18] you know, retirement planning and investment planning, insurance and estate planning. I took all of the CFP courses,

[06:23] got my degree in that,

[06:25] worked an internship my senior year at a financial planning firm in St. Louis, a big one.

[06:31] And that’s how I kicked off my career. So technically my degree is in finance, is in financial planning. That was my first professional career, which is also not as normal in this industry.

[06:42] Oftentimes it’s a second career.

[06:44] Yeah. And that’s how I got my start.

[06:48] Tara Bansal: And was money stressful and a source of stress growing up, would you say?

[06:55] Melissa Yano: Yeah, we didn’t have any.

[06:56] Tara Bansal: Yeah. Do you have any siblings?

[07:00] Melissa Yano: Yeah, I’m the oldest of four.

[07:01] Tara Bansal: Okay.

[07:02] Melissa Yano: So I’ve got two brothers and a sister. Wow, that’s a lot.

[07:06] Tara Bansal: And.

[07:09] Tara Bansal: Are you. I hope you enjoy what you’re doing.

[07:13] Melissa Yano: Yeah, I mean, I think it’s one of these industries where for somebody that’s a lifetime learner like myself,

[07:19] and I find some of the most random things very interesting.

[07:24] There’s always something new to learn. There’s always a different area that you can learn about or,

[07:33] you know, kind of niche down into.

[07:35] So I think it’s a very flexible career in that aspect where there’s infinite learning that could happen and you can really make it what you want it to be based on what you find interesting.

[07:48] When.

[07:49] Tara Bansal: When did you go out on your own? How long in the industry before you decided to do that?

[07:58] Melissa Yano: Well, so I didn’t really. Really, I was. I was kind of pushed into it.

[08:05] Tara Bansal: What does that mean?

[08:06] Melissa Yano: So I worked at two firms in St. Louis before I came out to California. When I came out here,

[08:14] I had previously worked at a very, like a family office, a very worth, multigenerational wealth firm.

[08:21] And I came out here and in like the Sacramento region, there’s really not a lot of big private trust companies handling, you know, huge amounts of wealth like that. And so I ended up finding a job at a small firm that worked with small business owners and kind of all a comprehensive capacity,

[08:41] 401ks, exit planning,

[08:44] group benefits, all insurances,

[08:46] wealth planning for the owners.

[08:48] And so it was a different,

[08:51] very different path than I’d been on, but I was already a cfp, so I came on as an advisor to essentially all of the clients.

[08:57] So there was a principal and myself that worked on all of the clients.

[09:00] And then I started to gain my own clients,

[09:02] and I wasn’t sure I wanted to own a business or be on my own. I had a lot of. I had a very young child that I was supporting. I had a lot of student loan debt.

[09:15] And so I was, it was not a situation where I’m like, I’m going to jump ship, not have any health insurance.

[09:21] Hopefully I can pay my bills for the next few years and I’ll just take whatever I can get. I was, I did not have a situation like that. So was an advisor in the firm really until 2020 and Covid hit and we had talked about should, you know, was I the succession plan,

[09:39] would I buy the firm from the principal?

[09:44] And I really was not sure. And in Covid it was pretty clear that he and his wife were looking to be done. And so I did, I asked, I said, hey, what would it,

[09:56] what would it look like for me to just fully take the firm over and buy.

[10:01] Tara Bansal: You out when you came on? Do you think that was what he was thinking or. Nobody thought that far ahead.

[10:10] Melissa Yano: Well,

[10:11] so I came out here in 2011.

[10:17] He may have, we have discussions about it. When I had only been at the firm a few years,

[10:24] it didn’t feel like they had a very clear idea of their timeline and what they were looking for.

[10:33] And at the time I didn’t feel like I had the capacity as a one woman show to take on all of the group benefits side and all the 401ks and all of the clients that we had.

[10:47] And so I was uncertain how it would work because it was the principal and me on kind of the wealth planning 401k side. We had a support person that supported the insurance and group benefits and did like the receptionist piece of that.

[11:04] And then the principal’s wife did,

[11:08] she was like the advisor for the group benefits and the broker for that.

[11:11] So it really felt like too much to take on for one person.

[11:17] Tara Bansal: And then you did end up buying the practice. How did that go and how has it been since then?

[11:25] Melissa Yano: So I did take the practice over at the end of 2020.

[11:29] The group benefits piece was sold separately to another broker. So I did not take that and I’m grateful that I did not. I don’t have,

[11:37] I don’t actually do any insurance at this point.

[11:41] It’s just not my favorite and I know amazing people that only work in that space. And so I refer that work out and I’m happy to do so. But I had myself, I had one support person and I was like, okay, we’re going to figure this out, let’s figure this out.

[12:04] So it was not. There are a lot of things that you don’t realize if you don’t own a business, that have to be done when you have a transition or that just have to be done on an ongoing basis when you have employees and when you are an independent RAA like I am,

[12:19] all of the compliance, all of those things. You do all of the things.

[12:22] It’s kind of a second job. So I will say my left eye twitched for like six months.

[12:30] Great. It was stressful, but I think more so now I found a rhythm.

[12:35] It’s just, you know, you learn as you go, you pivot as you go.

[12:38] And so I definitely think it was the right decision for me.

[12:41] I’m glad I did.

[12:43] Thankfully, I also have a spouse who is very supportive in that way, like emotionally, to say, you’re all right, you’re doing the right thing.

[12:54] Maybe you should go to bed early tonight, tomorrow’s a fresh day,

[12:57] you know, all of those things. And so I am lucky to have that too.

[13:01] Yeah, that’s great.

[13:03] Tara Bansal: What, what has surprised you in either a good or bad way, being in this business?

[13:16] Melissa Yano: Well, we. It’s still a male dominated business and we’re really trying to change that and trying to encourage more women to get in the business, stay in the business,

[13:31] take leadership roles and things like that.

[13:39] Negatively. I think I’m naturally a doer and a people pleaser.

[13:45] And so I feel like there were a lot of rules, some that I probably imposed on myself,

[13:51] some that were told to me about how I should be, how I should act.

[13:56] I felt very much like I was proving myself. So,

[13:59] you know, dress in neutrals, dress conservatively. Don’t be too sexy, don’t be too cute, don’t be too serious, don’t be too stern, don’t be too bossy, don’t be too know it all, but still know the answers.

[14:12] You know, all of those things. I felt like there was a lot of pressure to always have the right answer,

[14:18] to do things, to fix things for people.

[14:21] Tara Bansal: Where, where do you feel like those messages came from?

[14:25] Melissa Yano: Some of them were from colleagues, some of them were from bosses.

[14:28] Don’t wear that, don’t wear that, don’t do that. You should wear glasses. It makes you look older.

[14:33] You should not color your hair. Makes you look older.

[14:37] You need a bunch of certifications so that you can prove that you know what you’re talking about.

[14:41] So when I first came into the business, I felt very much like that, like I was proving something.

[14:47] I, um.

[14:49] Or that I had to fit in as much as I could with the men.

[14:54] Tara Bansal: Well, and that’s Part of my reason for doing this podcast, hence the name, is I.

[14:59] I don’t want that,

[15:01] and I don’t want other women to feel like they have to do that.

[15:06] Melissa Yano: So.

[15:06] Tara Bansal: Yeah.

[15:07] Melissa Yano: Yeah, we’re trying to get away from that.

[15:09] Tara Bansal: Yeah.

[15:10] Melissa Yano: And.

[15:12] Tara Bansal: What has helped you not feel that way or be able to do things your own way?

[15:23] Melissa Yano: Age?

[15:24] I’m. Yeah, some of it is. I mean, some of it is. I think you get to a certain. At least for me, I’ve gotten to a certain age where I’m trying to unlearn all of that and really lean into exactly who I want to be.

[15:40] And some of that,

[15:41] I actually.

[15:43] So I’m just more comfortable with who I am and my own personality and all of those quirks that I have.

[15:51] But, you know, last year, even I worked with someone,

[15:55] a stylist,

[15:56] to get more comfortable with the way that I want to dress. Like, I don’t only have to wear black suits,

[16:04] so I’ve tried to soften there with wearing more bright colors and wearing more.

[16:10] Not super float, not, like,

[16:12] super relaxed dresses, but things that are comfortable,

[16:17] comfortable and feel more feminine and being okay with,

[16:22] you know, not worrying as much as if I’m overdressed or I look,

[16:27] you know, too feminine or something like that. So I’ve let go of a lot of the black pantsuits,

[16:33] and now I’m wearing burgundy suits or,

[16:36] you know, long skirts with boots or whatever. I feel like.

[16:40] Tara Bansal: Yeah, that’s wonderful. And what is the structure of your firm now?

[16:46] Melissa Yano: So I am an independent Ria,

[16:49] and right now I just have one support person who change.

[16:54] Yeah. So she is an admin for me, and she’s excellent.

[16:59] So I have a virtual assistant named Beth, and she does a lot of work to save me for myself.

[17:06] So she does all of my email sorting. She does all of my scheduling for clients or for, you know, COI meetings or for any scheduling I have for travel and trips for work,

[17:19] sometimes for personal stuff like that. So it’s really been a game changer for me to have somebody supporting me for that.

[17:27] When did you project stuff?

[17:29] She. I have been working with her for,

[17:32] I think, two and a half years. Okay.

[17:34] Yeah.

[17:37] Tara Bansal: I interrupted you.

[17:38] Tara Bansal: I’m sorry. Keep going.

[17:39] Melissa Yano: What.

[17:42] Tara Bansal: What. What else do you outsource?

[17:46] Melissa Yano: I have an outside compliance firm that helps with my compliance.

[17:51] You know, I do some of this stuff my adv, but they support me kind of throughout the year. I outsource my it.

[17:58] Okay.

[17:59] I outsource a lot of the things that we used to do in house. Like, I Said the insurance piece of it.

[18:07] When I have employees that are W2 employees, I outsource the HR piece of that.

[18:15] Yes. I probably still do too many things myself.

[18:20] Yeah,

[18:21] do.

[18:24] Tara Bansal: So you do the planning, you do the investments, you do all of that.

[18:29] Melissa Yano: Yeah, but I do use a tamp.

[18:31] So I work with Assetmark as a tamp. So I build the portfolios from their investment strategies, but I don’t do the day to day trading in portfolios and I don’t build out like their strategies and rebalancing.

[18:46] I don’t do any of that. I don’t do reporting, I don’t do the billing.

[18:51] So I’ve outsourced that piece to them where I’m taking kind of a broader overview of it and I’ve got that extra layer of due diligence and portfolio managers and you know, I can talk to them about that.

[19:04] Tara Bansal: Who, who is your ideal client that you want to work with?

[19:09] Melissa Yano: So I work with small business owners mainly that have been in the business for a handful of years,

[19:17] are usually mid career, so 40s, 50s, maybe early 60s,

[19:21] and have some time until they exit their business.

[19:24] I work with a fair amount of business owners that are women that are the primary breadwinner in their family,

[19:31] which is my own situation as well.

[19:36] Yeah.

[19:37] That just want help and they want kind of a teammate or a partner to look at how their business supports their, their personal life and their personal finances and then to make a plan to at some point exit the business or retire, whatever that looks like.

[19:52] Okay.

[19:54] Tara Bansal: Do you help with 401ks and 403bs?

[19:59] Melissa Yano: Yeah, so I do all retirement plans,

[20:01] 401ks, 457s, 403 non qualified deferred comp. ESOP, all of those things.

[20:08] If I’m also working with the business owner and we’re being strategic about how that plan supports their business and supports them as a business owner and supports their own goals too.

[20:21] Great.

[20:22] Tara Bansal: Yeah, I think that’s important. How has being a business owner helped influence you with this role?

[20:34] Melissa Yano: Well, my, my coach tells me that I clearly seek out areas that I need. I feel like I need to master.

[20:44] Tara Bansal: Like you did way back when. Even just with getting enrolled in the financial planning, like you saw this need.

[20:49] Melissa Yano: For yourself and I learned it and then I felt like,

[20:54] I mean we always kind of worked with small business owners, but we had a lot of retirees and things like that. I’ve kind of honed in and I think it’s because I wanted to more expertise for myself as a business owner.

[21:06] I Empathize with it because I am a business owner and so many especially smaller business owners where it’s, you know, a one person owner or a couple of partners or a husband, wife that own the business,

[21:17] they just, they don’t know how to be strategic. They’re just concerned about doing the day to day, keeping the doors open. Do we have money in a bank account? Do we have clients or customers?

[21:28] And it can be much more intentional than that.

[21:32] And you can build a really nice even contingency plan to lower risk or, you know, look at the whole picture. How does estate planning fit in with the business? All of those things.

[21:42] And so, yeah, I think a lot of it is, you know, you seek out where you are in life and attract the kind of clients that are similar to you.

[21:52] Yeah, so that’s going to thread.

[21:54] Yeah, yeah.

[21:56] Tara Bansal: Do you, do you feel like you do business consulting in addition to the financial planning?

[22:05] Melissa Yano: So I am a certified exit planner and I have worked in engagements where we really focus on the process of exiting the business,

[22:20] identifying the successors, whether it’s internal or external, or maybe it’s a sale to, you know, private equity firm or an outside party and kind of working through that whole process with the CPAs and business brokers and all of those things and then coming through on the other side.

[22:35] And what does your situation look like now? And you know, what should we be doing there for your personal financial planning now?

[22:42] So I have done that piece, the exit planning piece, quite a bit.

[22:45] Um,

[22:47] some business consulting business planning just naturally, I think happens with what I do with the planning.

[22:55] So I can see if your business is running,

[22:59] you have no cash in your business and you very heavily rely on a line of credit.

[23:06] I mean, I can see that that is a problem and you’re probably not working in your business from a place of intentionality. But just like we’ve got to keep this thing going, we need cash coming in the door and that’s a hard place to make decisions from.

[23:21] And it’s hard to be flexible when you have a client that you lose or an employee that you lose or just a situation that comes up. Maybe you get,

[23:30] you, you get sick or you’re disabled and you don’t have a lot of margin there. So yes, taxes. I look at all the tax returns for the business as impersonal.

[23:40] So I often point out things there.

[23:43] Tara Bansal: What are some of your favorite parts of the job?

[23:48] Melissa Yano: I mean, I think it comes back down to why I originally got into the business is like the impact that you can really see on someone’s life.

[23:58] And I have always believed money as a learned skill.

[24:02] So there’s no. There’s a lot. So much emotion and shame around not knowing what to do with it or how to manage it or,

[24:09] you know, you should have done this when you were 20 years old, and then you’d be a multimillionaire now and really just trying to make that more accessible for people where they have somebody, they can ask questions without feeling like they’re stupid or that they can’t be honest or that I expect them to know a bunch of stuff.

[24:26] I mean, that’s really what I strive to do because I. Like I said, I came up in a family that did not talk about money, did not really know about money or investments or anything like that.

[24:37] And so I think it’s really important to get that knowledge out. I do a lot of work with 401k participants,

[24:44] again, to just talk about basic financial planning or what the tax changes mean or how a 401k works,

[24:51] all of those types of things. So bringing financial planning to people that have generally not thought that they were rich enough, smart enough, all of those things is very important to me.

[25:07] That’s beautiful.

[25:10] Tara Bansal: What are some of your core values related to that, and how did they show up in how you both work and live?

[25:21] Melissa Yano: Well, I recently just made a list last year of my core values, and I think they are different than they would have been 10 or 20 years ago. So now I’m really focused on client impact,

[25:35] on my own health,

[25:38] on the health of my own marriage and family,

[25:41] on social connections and on just like, an unhurriedness.

[25:46] And so that’s what I try to bring to, like, a whole person kind of thing to my clients and financial planning.

[25:54] It’s not just about this number in your bank account and what this performance return was and, you know, how much money you can spend.

[26:02] It’s,

[26:03] what do you and your spouse want to do?

[26:05] How do you want to take a trip with your adult kids so that you can all get together? Are, you know,

[26:13] you’re worried about your health, and so you want to make sure you can take this kickboxing class?

[26:21] All of those things. I think it’s much more about what you’re doing with the money and how it supports your life and less about the numbers on the page.

[26:30] Tara Bansal: Yeah, I 100% agree. What motivated you or helped you do that?

[26:38] Melissa Yano: Value exercise by coaching.

[26:42] So for me,

[26:43] anybody that doesn’t have some sort of mindset, coach or whatever, you know, somebody wants to call it life Coach or something like that.

[26:55] For me, someone who is very type A, very organized, very driven, very,

[27:00] you know, facts driven,

[27:02] brought up in a world of you work hard,

[27:05] sick days are not a thing. Like your work is your value.

[27:08] Undoing that is really hard. And you don’t even realize that you, you do life that way.

[27:16] And so having somebody that can ask you questions and, and really point out to you,

[27:22] you know, ask you what is important to you right now,

[27:25] what are you solving for?

[27:28] Makes you think like, oh, what am I solving for? Is it a specific number? Is it a number of clients, Is it a revenue number? Or is it just like the way that I want to feel when I go about my day?

[27:39] Yeah.

[27:40] Tara Bansal: And even to pause to think of that instead of just be for me reacting and running as hard as you can.

[27:48] Melissa Yano: Right. Yeah.

[27:49] Tara Bansal: I think way too many of us are like hearing you talk. I identify as a people pleaser and overly driven and I love,

[28:00] I forget what word you just used but like the feeling of more spaciousness or whatever in your day, I love.

[28:10] Melissa Yano: Yeah. And that is not natural, it does not come naturally to me. So it sounds silly to say I really have to work at creating margin, at not being reactive, at slowing down,

[28:25] but I do.

[28:28] Tara Bansal: And with that in mind, what have you done to help make that happen for you?

[28:37] Melissa Yano: I try to stay out of my email until somebody else has sorted it into what I actually need to respond to and I actually need to review.

[28:46] And just having the space in between when things are coming in, like I’m not notified when, when emails hit me, I look at it a few times a day, just having the space between something hitting and me thinking, oh my gosh, I have to find this, I have to stop what I’m doing,

[29:02] I have to fix this instead. I can look at it,

[29:05] you know, after I’ve already done some work in the morning and say, okay, let me take half an hour and answer these things. And it’s much less reactive for me.

[29:15] I also have someone schedule that me that won’t schedule me for eight meetings in a day and will not try to squish a meeting in on the 1:30 minute opening I have in the day, which I will do to myself all the time.

[29:31] And I say no. I say no a fair amount and I feel guilty doing it.

[29:37] But I also operate much better when I have some space.

[29:43] Tara Bansal: And it sounds like your virtual assistant in some situations saves you from yourself.

[29:51] Melissa Yano: Yes.

[29:51] Tara Bansal: Yeah,

[29:52] that’s good.

[29:53] When did you make the change?

[29:56] Maybe it was when you got the virtual assistant around email.

[30:00] I feel like that’s something I want to do, but I’m, like, too scared to do.

[30:05] Melissa Yano: I.

[30:08] Dan Martell’s book, Buy Back your Time is what spurred me to do it through a person in our mastermind, Kristen, who had been. I think it was Kristen who had been on a Carl Richards session where I think he interviewed Dan Martell and they talked about buying back your time.

[30:26] And. And Carl Richards has the email sorted.

[30:29] And I was like, that sounds amazing, because I hate digging through emails. I hate the way it makes me feel reactive.

[30:37] And so that’s where I started. It’s taken time. I mean, it’s certainly evolved. Toward the end of last year, I got very sloppy where I was getting in there again.

[30:44] So it takes time. But if you can start that process and have someone help you with it that is not so emotionally tied to everything and. And can answer some things for you and take that off your plate, it really does make a big difference.

[31:01] So that I’m. I reread that book at the beginning of this year, Buy Back youk Time, and I think it’s a great practical guide to how you can outsource some things.

[31:12] Tara Bansal: Yeah, I’m gonna check it out. Sounds good. What. Do you have an idea of what your ideal practice looks like?

[31:24] Melissa Yano: I. It’s a work in progress.

[31:27] It’s a work in progress, and I have to really guard again, like, I have to stay in my own lane and run your own. And run my own race is really important for me, for me right now.

[31:41] So I have actually had to bow out of books or podcasts or groups or things like that where I hear somebody wanting to 10x a business, wanting to have, you know, a $250 million business, or they want to have 500 clients or they want all of these things because then it makes me feel pressured.

[32:02] Like I should want these things. I should. If I’m doing this right, the right way, then I should want to grow and in 10x and grow a bazillion times over.

[32:10] And I think for where I’m at in my life, that’s not the right answer. So I have to really stay out of that and try to listen to myself right now.

[32:18] Because the perfect practice for me is smaller with a lot of depth for my clients.

[32:26] So I really want to know the people I work with,

[32:28] know about their lives, be very involved,

[32:32] have high touch on them every year, within the year.

[32:37] So having a very big practice with a lot of clients or a lot of employees to manage.

[32:43] Also, I find the idea of that draining to having a big kind of business to business over.

[32:53] So I think for me, it is a smaller enterprise that has not a ton of clients that I work with closely, and we really have a great relationship.

[33:04] Tara Bansal: Is there a certain number of households that you think would be ideal?

[33:10] Melissa Yano: To me, it’s, go ahead, I cut you off.

[33:14] Tara Bansal: No, my. For me, it’s like,

[33:16] I just think of, like, what is enough?

[33:18] We tell our clients that all the time. Right. And I’m sure as you’re working with business owners,

[33:24] and so that’s what comes to mind for me. Like,

[33:30] is it,

[33:32] you know, a certain number of clients,

[33:34] and then you’d be like, this is all I need. This is great.

[33:38] Melissa Yano: Yes. So I think for me, probably 75 clients would be my true ideal that were actual ideal clients for me. Yep.

[33:52] Tara Bansal: Where are you now? Either with, like, numbers or how many are not ideal?

[33:59] Melissa Yano: I think I’m not far from that. I think I have about 70 now,

[34:07] but the makeup has changed, and that’s on purpose. So like I said, I’m not taking on.

[34:13] I’m trying to be much more selective about who I say yes to, which also is something that I have to deal with. Changing my own identity as the person that can help everyone,

[34:27] it’s just not realistic. And so making sure I’m saying no,

[34:34] you know, I try to be honest, but kind to clients that I’m not the right fit for and make sure they get someplace else that is the right fit. But I’m not taking on,

[34:43] you know, 401k plans that I don’t have another relationship with with the owners. And I’ve set, you know, fee minimums. I’ve set minimums for assets under management now.

[34:57] And so some of it is just making sure that I’m getting the right clients in that are a good fit.

[35:08] Tara Bansal: Is that hard to do?

[35:11] Melissa Yano: Well, I mean, I think,

[35:13] you know, you have to have clients to run a business, and there’s a natural attrition. So if you have business owners, they sell their business.

[35:20] If you have clients, they pass away.

[35:23] And so there isn’t a.

[35:24] There’s a little bit of a changing of clients inside every year. But I have not done a lot of heavy marketing to this point.

[35:37] That’s really lined into my ideal client. Most of my referrals come from other advisors, insurance brokers,

[35:45] attorneys, bookkeepers, things like that that work with other business owners. And so I think what’s on my list this year is to see how I can really lean into those relationships so that they understand how I can help clients, but I don’t.

[36:03] Someone once told me that I was not good at business and I was not good at sales.

[36:09] So I’m still trying to overcome that story, I think.

[36:12] Yeah.

[36:12] Tara Bansal: Do you know who said that?

[36:15] Melissa Yano: Yes. Okay. I will never forget it.

[36:18] Tara Bansal: Oh, and what would you. What advice do you have for.

[36:27] Melissa Yano: I.

[36:27] Tara Bansal: Don’T know, women coming into this business or.

[36:32] Melissa Yano: Yeah, yeah. I mean, I think anybody coming into this business has to know that there are lots of ways to do it.

[36:41] And I think the best way to get started is to just get in and get some experience,

[36:46] wherever that is. And that helps you realize what you like, what you don’t like, the type of environment that you want to be in.

[36:55] I think for women especially,

[36:59] you don’t have to be a certain way, like, don’t feel like you should be on a certain track, on a certain timeline, that you don’t have to act a certain way.

[37:08] There is a spot for you. Like, there is a place for you to be exactly who you are. And there’s a lot of value in that because we, as women,

[37:15] advise differently.

[37:17] We have different conversations,

[37:20] and there is a lot of value in that. It’s a superpower.

[37:24] So if you can know that going in and stay in the business and find your own path, I think it can be really rewarding.

[37:35] Tara Bansal: I agree. How. How do you think we can get more women into the business?

[37:42] Melissa Yano: Well, I think trying to support students.

[37:46] So I am part of my FPA Financial Planning association chapter. We have a really high attendance rate or involvement from student bodies from Chico State, from Sac State, from UC Davis, which are local schools around here.

[38:01] And so we are trying to support them however we can so that they can learn how to come into the business so that they have conn with advisors that need,

[38:12] you know, younger advisors or younger support people that are coming out of school.

[38:20] So that is how I’m trying to.

[38:22] Tara Bansal: Support other women getting in. Yeah. Did you feel like you had any mentors or anyone that helped support you?

[38:35] Melissa Yano: Um, well, I. The school that I had had a really strong internship program.

[38:42] Um,

[38:44] so, like, the head of the financial planning department,

[38:47] he.

[38:49] It was like an evening.

[38:52] It wasn’t a dinner, but it was like a meet and greet kind of thing where all of the firms, big firms around St. Louis,

[38:58] and there were a lot there. There were several big financial planning firms there.

[39:02] They would come to this meet and greet and you would have students there and they would interview us,

[39:07] like a speed dating kind of thing, because they were looking for interns or perhaps, you Know students that could come out and work for their businesses. And so I did that.

[39:17] I had three offers for internships from three different firms. And so I was lucky enough to be able to choose one.

[39:26] It was an independent firm. They had 28,

[39:29] I think, at that point, advisors,

[39:31] the team that I worked with had a female advisor and a male advisor.

[39:36] And so I really got to see that a female advisor. And there weren’t a ton in the firm,

[39:42] so I got to see that. And the next firm I worked at, it was the principals were probably 50, 50 male and female. Oh, wow. So I was lucky that I got to see women in those roles.

[39:58] I mean, I still go to conferences where maybe there are four or six women at the whole thing.

[40:04] Yeah. And that’s okay. That’s part of it. But,

[40:08] yeah, I think I saw women in that. An actual financial advisory role early on.

[40:14] Tara Bansal: That can make a difference.

[40:16] Tara Bansal: Yeah.

[40:17] Tara Bansal: What does success look like or feel like for you these days?

[40:25] Melissa Yano: Well, I am trying to figure that out.

[40:28] But I do know,

[40:30] as we all are,

[40:31] it’s a continuum. I do know for me, it is at this point, having more space,

[40:40] being able to.

[40:42] And I’m once again lucky that I. I’m in a place in my business where I can be selective about the clients that I bring on that are really good fits for me.

[40:51] Just kind of being.

[40:53] Knowing that I have enough,

[40:55] and then just being able to be a little softer in general.

[40:59] So I keep reminding my. My coaches,

[41:06] he often says to me, for your consideration,

[41:09] you should know that not everyone feels compelled to live their life this way. Like, not everyone overthinks every decision.

[41:18] Not everyone feels like they need to get an A plus on everything. And so I think just sitting in this place of, yeah, having enough, I’m enough.

[41:29] My work doesn’t prove that I’m enough.

[41:32] Just being really comfortable with myself, which is not a number figure, and it’s not,

[41:37] you know, a revenue figure or something like that. It’s just being satisfied.

[41:47] Tara Bansal: I feel like we all need to hear that, or maybe I just do, because I think we’re wired pretty similarly.

[41:52] What advice would you have for your younger self?

[41:56] Melissa Yano: Oh, chill out.

[42:00] Chill out.

[42:02] You know what? I think my younger self,

[42:07] I appreciate her very much because she was so resourceful and did exactly what she needed to do.

[42:13] So.

[42:18] I am grateful that it happened that way. But at the time, I didn’t feel like I had a choice. Now part of my success now is I get to choose.

[42:27] So I think just letting her know that,

[42:30] like this, all.

[42:31] All the Struggle. All of this work will pay off and at one point you will. At some point you’ll get to chill out and do Pilates on Friday mornings.

[42:42] Tara Bansal: At 8am and that’s in your schedule.

[42:46] Melissa Yano: That is in my schedule. And I do not divert from that if I can at all help it.

[42:52] Tara Bansal: What I feel like you are a learner. How do you invest in yourself?

[42:58] Melissa Yano: I.

[42:59] Through experts.

[43:04] Like I said, I have a coach and have now four several years actually. I invested in Limitless Advisors, which, like you said, is how we met.

[43:13] Which was a great place to not only learn about the business of advising, like the actual business, but to meet so many people,

[43:21] met so many great people. Sometimes running a business is lonely.

[43:25] I invested in someone to help me dial myself and make that a little easier last year because I’m in perimenopause and your body is shifts and you’re like, what is this?

[43:35] I don’t know what to do here anymore.

[43:38] You know, I invest in courses or certifications that are once again knowledge of things that I either feel like I need to shore up on or need to like, just want to learn for myself.

[43:52] And then honestly, I indulge in facials like a few times a year.

[43:58] And that is an investment that’s great in my skin.

[44:02] Tara Bansal: Do you. How do you decide? Do you have a budget or.

[44:11] Melissa Yano: I don’t. I.

[44:13] I know the rule of thumb. I’ve seen rule of thumbs that are 5% or 10% of, you know, kind of your revenue should go to professional or personal development.

[44:24] Um,

[44:25] I don’t spend.

[44:26] I don’t spend that much. I’m a frugal person. But last year I experimented a little bit with spending more in areas that perhaps I didn’t need to justify because there was a super practical reason.

[44:41] Um, so no, I don’t budget for things like books or audiobooks or things like that. Those are pretty much if I think I’m going to read it, that’s a worthwhile investment.

[44:52] But bigger things,

[44:53] once I bit the bullet to pay for an actual coach,

[44:57] that’s a.

[44:59] That’s the best investment I’ve ever made.

[45:01] Oh,

[45:02] I love it.

[45:05] Tara Bansal: What do you have a favorite book, podcast or resource that you’re loving right now?

[45:12] Melissa Yano: Um, let’s see. So I split my books between nonfiction and fiction. Me too.

[45:18] Tara Bansal: Yeah, I try to alternate a lot.

[45:21] Melissa Yano: Yeah, I read a lot. So I just. I said buy back your time. I think that’s a great book. I just read the Frozen River.

[45:30] Tara Bansal: Uhhuh. I love.

[45:30] Melissa Yano: Which is kind of like a historic oh, what a great book.

[45:34] And then I don’t think I have kind of bowed out of podcasts that are related to, like, advising.

[45:41] So there. I love Cal Newport’s Deep Questions.

[45:46] I actually like Money for Couples with Ramit Sethi because I think that is actually helpful. Just conversations that I have with my own husband. You know, it’s about couples and their money.

[45:59] I love the visibility shift. That’s Ellie Steinbrink does that.

[46:05] She’s this stylist that I work with. If you are a woman that’s an advisor, that’s of kind. Kind of in your 40s, 50s, I think that’s a great one. Just to, you know, make you think outside the box a little bit as far as how you show up in the world.

[46:21] Yeah.

[46:22] Wonderful.

[46:24] Tara Bansal: Your go to self care ritual.

[46:27] Melissa Yano: Well, every morning I start my day with reading.

[46:31] So I either read or listen to an audiobook. And I drink coffee, which is now decaf,

[46:37] every day. So I get up pretty much the same time every day of the week. And I do this to start every single day,

[46:43] even if I have to get up a little earlier because I got to be out the door early. I make sure I have a half an hour to just read and drink coffee and just be.

[46:52] And then I do really the only thing I indulge in for myself. I feel very strongly about skin care. So please, ladies, wear your sunscreen.

[47:02] But I do like to have like a facial or a massage, and I normally try to wrap that into when I have like a business planning or a CEO retreat.

[47:12] So if I’m really getting into the weeds of my business for a day or two or doing,

[47:17] you know, heavy work with my coach for a day or two, then I will end that with a massage or a facial.

[47:23] I love it.

[47:24] Tara Bansal: A nice reward.

[47:25] Melissa Yano: I bribe myself. Yeah. To look forward to.

[47:29] Tara Bansal: What’s one thing bringing you joy right now?

[47:32] Melissa Yano: Oh,

[47:39] Something bringing me joy.

[47:44] Movement.

[47:46] Movement.

[47:48] Yeah. I feel like I do two Pilates classes and I’ve started back to hot yoga. And it’s just really kind of clears out everything in the brain,

[48:00] which sounds trite, but for me, when it’s wintertime and it’s cold and, you know, especially cold there or it’s rainy,

[48:07] you get in there and you can just like wash it out.

[48:14] Tara Bansal: Anything else you’d like to share that we didn’t cover?

[48:23] Melissa Yano: I don’t think so. I mean, I really appreciate what you’re doing here because women advisors, female advisors, women business owners really do need to support each other. I think we’re really hard on ourselves.

[48:37] I think we undervalue ourselves.

[48:40] And so,

[48:43] you know, sometimes you need somebody to say, hey, you’re undercharging or you’re over servicing or things like that. And so the more that we can hear each other’s stories and each other’s struggles and know that,

[48:53] you know,

[48:54] all paths are different, but all paths are, you know, individual. And they’re good paths, I think is is really important.

[49:01] So we should all give ourselves more grace.

[49:04] Tara Bansal: Oh, I love that. You said that so beautifully. I feel like that’s the perfect way to end. So thank you so much, Melissa.

[49:11] Melissa Yano: Yeah, my pleasure. Thank you. This is a really great podcast.

[49:16] Tara Bansal: I re listened to this episode with Melissa more than I usually do, and I kept coming back to one core theme.

[49:24] Permission.

[49:25] Melissa talked about leaning into who she actually is and how age has helped her stop trying so hard to please everyone,

[49:34] fit a mold, or prove herself,

[49:37] especially in a male dominated industry.

[49:41] That really struck a chord with me.

[49:43] As women in this profession,

[49:45] especially those of us who are driven doers and people pleasers,

[49:50] we absorb subtle messages about how we should show up.

[49:55] Be competent, but not intimidating.

[49:58] Be confident, but not too strong or arrogant.

[50:02] Grow bigger, earn more,

[50:04] do more,

[50:06] do it all.

[50:07] But Melissa’s quiet clarity felt different.

[50:10] She’s opting out of the noise and other people’s expectations.

[50:14] She’s intentionally choosing fewer clients with deeper relationships, a practice that fits her life,

[50:23] delegating what drains her spaciousness instead of constantly filling every moment.

[50:29] And that question,

[50:31] what is enough?

[50:32] Is one that I have loved for a long time and I keep coming back to.

[50:37] We ask our clients that question all the time,

[50:40] but are we asking ourselves what is enough?

[50:44] I loved her courage to step away from the messaging that says more is better,

[50:49] that 10 times growth is the goal. That scale equals impact.

[50:55] What if impact isn’t about size?

[50:58] What if it’s about presence and how you show up?

[51:01] About being a role model for our clients,

[51:05] our families, and the people around us.

[51:08] That success can include balance and softness in our own definition of joy.

[51:14] Melissa spoke about investing in herself,

[51:17] getting a coach,

[51:18] challenging, limiting beliefs,

[51:21] choosing growth personally, not just professionally.

[51:25] I loved how clear she was about her values and how honest she was that they’ve evolved over time.

[51:31] She’s designing her life on purpose.

[51:34] And if I’m honest, I’m craving more of that spaciousness too.

[51:39] At the beginning of this year, I chose my word or theme for 2026 to be pause.

[51:45] Because I want less reacting and more intentional choosing,

[51:50] less proving and more being.

[51:53] I want more cushion I want more margin,

[51:56] more breadth between the ask and my answer.

[52:00] I want to pause before I commit pause before I take something on.

[52:05] I want my default to be no.

[52:07] Unless it’s a clear, wholehearted hell yes.

[52:11] This episode reminded me, and I hope it reminds you,

[52:15] that there is no single quote right way to build a practice or a life.

[52:21] You don’t have to wear the black pants suit or the skirt suit with pantyhose like I once had to.

[52:27] You don’t have to build the giant firm.

[52:29] You don’t have to take on every client.

[52:32] You don’t have to keep doing things just because you can look for and feel the real yeses.

[52:40] You get to design your life and your practice in a way that honors your strengths,

[52:46] your energy,

[52:47] and what gives you joy.

[52:50] You have the permission to do it your way and to lean fully into who you truly are.

[52:57] Thank you for listening to her life, her practice, Her Way A Podcast for and About Female Financial Advisors.

[53:06] I truly hope you have enjoyed this podcast and got some value from it. If so, I would love to ask a favor of you.

[53:13] Please go to Apple Podcasts or Spotify and rate and review my podcast. This will help me get the word out to other amazing like minded female financial advisors.

[53:24] You can also send it to a friend or two who you think would gain something from listening to it.

[53:30] Until next time, I’m wishing you the very best.

Capital Wealth Planners – Melissa’s Firm
https://capitalwealthplanner.com/

Limitless Advisor with Stephanie Bogan
https://limitlessfa.life/

AssetMark – TAMP Solution Melissa Utilizes
https://www.assetmark.com/

Buy Back Your Time by Dan Martell
https://www.buybackyourtime.com

The Frozen River by Ariel Lawhon
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/112975658-the-frozen-river

Deep Questions Podcast – Cal Newport
https://www.calnewport.com/podcast/

Money for Couples – Ramit Sethi
https://www.iwillteachyoutoberich.com/podcast/

The Visibility Shift – Ellie Steinbrink
https://www.elliesteinbrink.com/podcast/categories/the-visibility-shift-podcast

Financial Planning Association (FPA)
https://www.financialplanningassociation.org

Melissa M. Yano, CFP® CExP™

As a business owner herself, Melissa understands the time and energy demands owners face. She brings over seventeen years of in-depth experience in financial planning. Her expertise extends beyond traditional investment management to include financial analysis, cash flow planning, and retirement income forecasting tailored specifically for business owners and their families.

Before Capital Wealth Planners, Melissa was a highly respected Client Manager for St. Louis Trust Company servicing multi-generational high-net-worth families in all aspects of wealth planning. Her depth of experience also includes Moneta Group, where she was a client support member, prepping review materials and managing stock and bond trades. Melissa graduated magna cum laude with a BSBA in Finance from the University of Missouri – St. Louis, through the CFP® board-registered program in Financial Planning and has held her CFP® designation since 2011.

Melissa lives with her family and dog outside of Sacramento. She enjoys reading, yoga and desserts of all types.